She is What I Hate

She makes me want to scream. She can't see what he is, or that he wanted her?

Oh why, why why why, do his words, and thoughts of her make me envious, make me jealous? Conversations shared between us, made it known to me, that I can never have him. I could give him the world wrapped by a chain, but it would change not a thing.

Oh if he could see that I'm serious, that I would not hurt him, but would that change a thing? How could he want to get something deeper than a friendship again, especially when all he wants is her?

She makes my blood boil, and she hurt him, which is more the reason to despise her like I do. 

She makes me want to bleed, and let out my endorphins that escaped me so long ago, but I could never get him from dropping blood.

He makes me forget, and makes me feel better, when I need somebody there, and nobody is around, or cares. How on earth is it possible that he is so blind to how I feel? I am open as much as possibly able, without letting out what I want to tell.

Last night when he told me about her, and how he just cried, It made me want to make her see what she hurt, and lost that I myself found. Should I feel better because I have him in my life? I don't have a clue, and if I should, its not the best feeling it could be, especially when he still wants her.

Dearest Darling,

She is gone, and somebody else wants you. To me you are the most amazing being I have had the pleasure of knowing. Why can't you see how much you mean to me, and what I would give for you? Oh darling, I want to belong...to you, but is that to much to ever want from you? Maybe I have my wants in life set to high. Why Can't you just see that you mean too much to let you go? I want to let you know, but I know you wouldn't want to hear it.

Dearest Darling,

She is gone, and somebody else wants you. 

Oh how I wish I could be in her place, but still be his. She is driving the steam through my veins, and in sooner days, I'll expose myself, and in that time, I know I'll be pushed away again.