Bad Mother (Rewritten)

you never wanted me

always being told

"You were just a mistake that shouldn't have been born"

those words rang in my head so many times as a young child

a loner and outcast has been born.....

i was just a pawn in your game

to trap my father's wealthy family in marriage

your plan failed

so you gave me away to my grandparents

but only after my stepfather got me so drunk i was sick for a long time

and threw me into a concrete and cinderblock bookcase

i was only 4 fuckin years old......

you faded from my life rarely seeing you but,

i only mattered to you when it was convient to you

and to try and spoil me to make up for abandoning me for most of my life

you moved me into a house with a rapist

your no kind of mother

to force your child to marry a rapist

after getting pregnant and then to say

"Your not going to make the same mistake I made and not be married to the man that knocked you up"

and then stood by and watch

as your child was raped and beaten almost to death

and even one of your own grandchildren was murdered

yet you done nothing

such a cold heart

you lie and tell people

that things were different than what they were

how cold......

does those lies

help you to sleep at night

and yet still

YOU DID NOTHING......

not until you were forced to act

even then you still never cared

yet you forced a second marriage to a man

i wanted nothing to do with

after another child resulting from a rape

and still you tell lies to make things seem how you wanted them to be

and even after this man abused me and my kids

i'm only a paycheck to you

you only want to be around

when it benfits you

and yet you say

"You owe me everything"

i owe you

NOTHING.....

you turned your back

when it came to helping your child and grandchildren

to not be left out on the street homeless

and left us to fend for ourselves

so spew your lies of

"I've done everything to help you"

to someone else

those words fall on deaf ears to me

they mean nothing to me now....

just as you mean nothing to me now....

people like you should never have been allowed to breed

just like a leech

your sucking the life from me

but.....

NO MORE.....

i will not allow you to corrupt me or my children anymore

and you will NOT be the death of me

and how dare you try to tell me how to raise my kids

you didn't raise me, my sister or my brother

you threw us away like trash given to however would take us

but wouldn't allow our aunt to take us

to keep us together

you were a selfish bitch

we meant nothing to you.

YOUR A BAD MOTHER!!!

AND I HATE YOU FOR WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH!!!