Suspended (part 6)

Hayley struggled through her swirling thoughts, as she slowly regained consciousness. She woke with a long groan. Her head felt like an army of tiny elves had spent the night hammering away at her skull. Something bright shone in her eyes and she weakly lifted her hand to her face to shield herself from the illumination. For several seconds she imagined herself within the safe confines of her bedroom at home, but as she cracked open her eyes, she came face to face with an unfamiliar long brown table situated next to her. The room spun as she oriented herself to her new surroundings. The sheets felt too stiff, the blanket too thin, the mattress too hard, the room too bright. Where was her bedroom? What had happened? She appeared to be in some sort of hospital room. A puke green curtain hung on the long silver pole off to her left. A black television hung on the far wall over a tan door that presumably led to the bathroom. The air smelled of disinfectant, leaving a sharp taste at the back of her mouth.

She felt a warm hand wrap lightly around her fore arm, and a distinctly familiar voice spoke. “Honey. Oh, honey you’re awake.”

Hayley opened her eyes completely and was surprised to see her mother’s face looking down at her. Hayley smiled and gazed up at the woman that had given her life.

“Mom.” Hayley shifted herself on the bed, and pain shot through her abdomen, reminding her of everything that had happened in the last few days. Her stomach clenched as a nauseating sensation ran through her body. She couldn’t feel the baby anymore, but was instead replaced with a heavy sensation through the core of her being. “The baby, what happened to the baby?” Hayley demanded, panic rising within her.

“Oh, I’m sorry honey,” spoke her mother with caring, she then continued in a simplistic singsong voice, “the baby has to go. You don’t think we’d let a sinner like you propagate your evil ways with a child, do you?”

“Wh-what?” Hayley stammered, surprised at the harsh words her mother spoke to her.

“See.” Said her mother as she pointed down at Hayley’s stomach.

Hayley followed her mother’s thin finger down until she gazed at her own body. Blood began to flow out from between her legs, staining the sheets a dark crimson.

“No!” Hayley screamed, tears streaming down her desperate face.

The blood pooled beneath her, saturating the fabric. Soon it spread out and began to spill onto the floor.

Her mother slowly increased her grip on Hayley’s arm and spoke gently, “Shh…it’s ok. It has to die. Now you can return to us.”

“You’re lying. It’s not true.” Hayley screamed. Her insides twisted and writhed within her; a painful stretching began in her lower abdomen and she involuntarily screamed in pain.

“Ah yes. It is coming soon.” Her mother spoke with an eerie, unnatural calm, as she stared almost hungrily at her daughter’s forthcoming child.

Hayley let out another scream as the pressure increased and held for several seconds. The pain became so intense she could hardly breathe. At last she felt a release and the agony became bearable once again.

“Good. It is dead.”

A tiny human form lay between her legs swaddled in blood. Its arms, no bigger than her fingers, its face twisted in a grimace of pain. Hayley could not tear her gaze from the bloody corpse, although its presence twisted like a knife in her chest.

The room began to spin and Hayley, her tears beginning to mix with her now runny nose, squeezed her eyes tightly closed, unwilling to believe in the reality of her baby’s death.

“My baby…” Hayley breathed as the full force of death struck her all at once. She spoke the phrase again, this time screaming it as loud as she could, a cry of despair, of longing, for her lost offspring.

As she did so, the room ceased to spin and she felt a rush of air wash over her face. There seemed to be a voice in the breeze, and she strained her ears to hear and understand, but just as she seemed on the edge of comprehension, her eyes fluttered open.

Hayley blinked in confusion. Her heart pounded in her chest, threatening to leap into her throat and escape. The room appeared to be the same, but her mother had disappeared, as well as all the blood and her child. Tentatively, she ran her hand over the sheets that covered her, but the fabric was merely a little damp. Nothing else, no blood, not even the trace of a stain. She gently touched her face, searching for reality, unsure of what had just happened, whether it was merely a dream, or if what she experienced had in fact occurred. Her face was wet and she pulled her hand back, frightened that it might be blood, but no, it was only sweat. Her breathing calmed somewhat as she heard footsteps coming quickly down the hall.

Hayley looked up as a male nurse walked into the room. He had a trim build, and was tall, at least six feet. He had short caramel colored hair and several wide shallow scratch marks along his right cheek to just above his temple.

“Are you ok?” He asked concern etched in his voice. He touched her arm and she flinched, remembering what she was now hoping was just a dream, a horrific, disturbing dream.

“My baby.” Hayley insisted. She hurredly ran her finger along her lower abdomen, finding a measure of comfort in the hard bulge that protruded over her waist line. “Is my baby ok?” She searched his face anxiously.

He smiled, and it reminded her of Brennan, putting her a little at ease. “Yes, your baby is fine. You did go into premature labor, and you suffered from some minor cervical bleeding, but nothing we weren’t able to stop. We’ve actually been more concerned about you. We were afraid you were going to slip into a coma.”

“How long have I been out?” Hayley asked, relief surging through her.

“Three days.”

“What about B—I mean the man that was with me? Is he alive?” Hayley found herself desperately hoping his life hadn’t been cut short by an officer’s bullet.

“I’m sorry, but I’m not supposed to say anything to you. Dr. Robertson wanted to make sure you were well on your way to recovery before you receive any outside news. Speaking of Dr. Robertson, he’ll want to know that you are awake.”

“Please tell me about the man. I need to know.” Hayley wasn’t sure exactly what drove her to being so insistent about knowing, she only knew something within her absolutely had to keep asking until she found the answer.

He paused, considering the consequences of his actions. “Ok. I’ll tell you. But you have to promise to not let anyone know I told you.”

“Sure.”

“Well, the first man died from a gunshot wound. He was rushed to a hospital, but the EMTs pronounced him dead upon arrival. The other man suffered some lacerations to his torso and a gunshot wound to his shoulder as well, but managed to pull through.”

“Do you know anything else?” Hayley asked, a strange sense of relief seeping through her. Brennan was alive. He had to be since the man that lived hadn’t been shot in the stomach.

“Not officially, no.”

“Officially?”

“I have a friend that treated the second man and he told me some things, but I really don’t think I should be telling you, considering your possible involvement.”

“What things did he say?” Hayley asked, her mind racing with the possibilities.

“I-I really shouldn’t.” He stammered.

“Please.”

“Ok. Tim said that the whole time on the way to the hospital, Tim’s my friend by the way, but anyway, Tim said that during that time the man kept on mumbling about having lost.”

“Lost? Like losing money?”

“Money. Was money involved?” The nurse inquired, mild surprise displayed on his face.

Hayley hesitated, afraid to give him too much information. “I was just guessing.” Hayley finally lied. “So what did he say he lost?”

“That’s the thing. He didn’t say. But he seemed very upset about it.” He paused before taking in a deep breath and changing the subject. “But I really should go get the doctor.”

“Ok. Thank you for being so helpful.”

“No problem.” He smiled and turned, walking briskly from the room.

Hayley rested her head back down on the pillow and thought about what the nurse had told her. She secretly hoped Brennan had been concerned for her life, and was afraid of losing her, as she had been afraid of losing him, but common sense seemed to indicate it was just the money, or the loss of freedom that he had been mourning in the back of that ambulance. She felt tired but didn’t want to fall back to sleep for fear of having another nightmare.

After about five minutes, the doctor showed up. He was a nice man, with a kind face. He immediately set Hayley at ease and she felt completely comfortable when he began to ask her some questions about her obstetrician and her health. He took down her name, insurance, and place of residence, and promised to have the paperwork up for her stay in the hospital soon. He gave her a brief examination and reminded her to take things easy for the next couple of days considering the trauma her body had recently gone through. Then he brought up the reason why she was here, and the calmness she had experienced from earlier began to dissipate.

“From what I hear, you have gone through quite a bit in the last couple of days.” Dr. Robertson said. He sat on a chair next to her bed, so he was on basically the same eye level as her.

“Yeah.” Hayley responded vaguely.

“Your body is recovering quite nicely, more quickly than I would have thought, in fact.”

“I’ve always been a quick healer.” Hayley quipped.

“I can see that. And as such, I should let you know that the police do wish to question you as soon as possible. Now I would prefer that no one disturb you for at least another day or so, so you can have as much time as possible to recover, but seeing as you are stable, and the fact that I am not allowed to interfere with an active investigation, you can expect to have a visit with a detective fairly soon.”

Hayley tensed. “How soon?”

“Today sometime, I’m sure. But don’t worry, it’s just a few questions, and if you get very tired, you can ask to finish the questioning at a later time.”

“Okay.” Hayley sighed internally, wishing this were all over. “Is it alright if I go to sleep now? I’m pretty tired.”

“That sounds like a good idea. Just remember to press the button if you should need anything.” Said Dr. Robertson as he stood up and exited the room, shutting the door behind him as he did so.

Hayley tried to sleep, but the dream lay too fresh on her mind, and she could only manage a cat nap. Realizing sleep would not be coming anytime soon, she lay on the bed staring at the plain white, tiled ceiling. She soon grew restless from her boredom, her mind wandering listlessly. Why hadn’t her mother showed up yet? Didn’t she care at all? Then she realized her mother probably had no idea where she was. The doctor had needed to ask her for her name since she didn’t have any identifying information on her and she had left her purse in the truck. The dream crossed her mind again and she subconsciously shivered. Maybe she didn’t want her mother coming to see her after all.

She searched her bedding and the nearby table for the remote to turn on the T.V. but couldn’t find it. She wished she knew what was going on with Brennan right now. He was in all likelihood in jail; if not for his most recent crimes, then for the breaking of his parole, at least.

She felt the baby move, and a smile played across her lips. She gently stroked her round stomach and spoke quietly to it. “Kicking me now, huh? Well that’s just fine as long as you stay safe, little guy.”

She thought of the word safe and Brennan’s face popped up in her mind. Safe. It seemed so foreign to her now. She felt exposed and afraid. The police were coming soon, and she had no idea whether to tell them a lie, the truth, or nothing. The desire to cut herself off from all her problems, all her worries, rose up strong within her, but she knew she didn’t have the resources to accomplish that wish. Sighing, she closed her eyes tight. Maybe if I ignore it long enough it will go away. The childish plea rang through her mind like a stuck record, playing over and over again. She was feeling desperate and overwhelmed again, but this time she couldn’t run away from her problems. This time they were running at her full-force and all she could do was brace herself for it.