P.S. I Love You [19]

It was biology and I was staring at Dustin’s empty seat. I wanted to cry just because I knew he was scared. He thought I would get mad. Also that he may like Jenna more than me. It was just terrible thinking about it.

“Wow, you look so sad.” Michelle said tapping me on the shoulder

“Oh I am just a little sad.” I said

“Oh because now you realized you made a mistake breaking up with Jack.”

“You know that I am dating Dustin?”

“Yeah I know that.”

“Okay then.” I started to turn around feeling a little awkward

“Wait, then why are you sad?”

“Because Dustin may like Jenna more than me.”

“That’s a rumor I am spreading around.”

            I turned around only because the teacher came in. I kept turning myself half way to talk to Michelle, but I just couldn’t think of the right words to say.

            It was after school and Jenna comes running up to me and then she hugs me. “Guess what I just found out?” she asked me putting a huge grin on her face

“What?” I asked scared to hear what it was.

“Dustin may like me more than that Serenity girl. Isn’t that great?”

“Yeah, except I am that Serenity girl.”

“Oh sorry I was so excited I forgot.”

“Yeah. I think he actually likes you a lot more than me or he would be back by now.”

“What do you mean?”

            I just ran away couldn’t answer that question and of course I started to cry again. I hate how sensitive I am. I wish I knew how to deal with these kinds of problems. I hate my life. I want everything to change.

            I went home called Dustin, but once he answered I hung up I don’t think I could really handle talking to him right now. I think that once all this is figured out then I can talk to him. But I don’t know how to figure this out if I don’t want to talk to him. I just decided to call him, “Dustin? Do you like me or Jenna more?” I ask right off the back

“I can’t choose.” He responded

“I understand.”

“Why?”

“I am losing it and I thought I have finally found the guy I wanted, but he doesn’t even know his feelings. It was nice talking to you. BYE.” I think that was my final goodbye. I will never know who he will choose and I don’t care. This is such a stupid school I wish things can go back to normal.

            The next day at school Jenna come up to me and asks, “That goodbye you gave Dustin, he wants to know if that was your final goodbye?”

“Yes I think it is.” I answered and not even a tear. He was not worth crying over anymore

“Why?”

“He loves you not me.”

“Is that what he said?”

“No, but that’s what he intended.”

“YESSSSSSS!!!!!” Jenna yelled

“Thanks for being supported.” I said and walked away and didn’t talk to her for the rest of the day. Actually I didn’t talk to her for the rest of the year.